Godwin Eduok
Once upon a time, I naively thought the NUJ was big enough for all journalists. How adorable. I now realize the NUJ is just the ceremonial village square where we gather once a year to pretend we are still one big, happy family.
The real action is in the startups. Journalism has discovered entrepreneurship, and the product is groups. We have Ikot Media Group, Yo Media Professionals, Morning Tea Correspondents, and Night Dispatchers United. Blink and your street will launch the Close Gate Press Club with a constitution, an excos list, and a WhatsApp logo. At this rate, every journalist will soon be president of their own association and sole member of their own chapel.
The genius part is this: nobody actually leaves NUJ. That would be risky. Instead, they keep their NUJ ID card for credibility and run their boutique unions for prominence. It is like being married but keeping five side families because “networking.” They want the relevance of the big name and the clout of the small cartel. Brilliant!
Also read: ‘Let us Salvage Media in Akwa Ibom Together’ – Journalist urges
We now have forums for every senatorial district, federal constituency, LGA, ward, village, kindred, and breakfast table. Print, non-print, online, offline, electronic, electrical, and soon, intercom media. There are Akwa Ibom North East Media Professionals, Akwa Ibom North West Media Professionals and Eket Senatorial District Media Professionals. All for:
- Book appointments to greet politicians.
- Dress well and grin for the group photo.
- Collect “transport,” “prayers,” and “encouragement” in brown envelopes.
- Promise wall-to-wall coverage till 2027.
- Write one press statement and email it to 83 platforms so it trends as “multiple sources.”
Then comes State Congress; the scattered tribes return home for Christmas. The ever-young, ever-vibrant, ever-visionary leader mounts the pulpit. To be fair, the man tries. He runs the most inclusive union in the history of inclusivity. He opens the door, shares the food, hugs everyone, and still finds time to shape the profession and drive the industry between selfies. There is literally nothing left to complain about, except that we all insist on complaining in our new groups anyway.
So yes, NUJ is enough. Absolutely. We just prefer to slice it into 10,000 bite-sized unions so everyone can be chairman of something. Unity is overrated. Personal letterhead is forever.
Which is why I am launching mine next month: Elderly Media Professionals, 60 and above. Our motto: “We Were Here First.” Benefits include automatic front-row seats, uninterrupted microphone time, free eye glasses and the constitutional right to start every speech with “Back in our day.”
Admission is free. Influence is premium. Apply now before your neighbour forms Elderly Media Professionals, Diaspora Chapter.
And reactions to rising media groups
Using Facebook, some media professionals are reacting to the rising wave of media groups in the Akwa Ibom by the some journalists, though they are registered members of NUJ.
James Edet
My Able Chairman of Elderly Media Professionals, abeg check if I qualify—make I secure my seat early.
Only wahala be say, at this rate, media briefings go get 100 chairmen, two “stakeholders,” and only one floor member wey no even know wetin dey sup—before closing prayer, dem don swear am in as Acting Chairman of one brand-new association wey just form on the spot.
Ifreke Udoudo
Hahahaha ! I saw this coming sometime ago, my able professional senior. It is very unfortunate that, many were called, while few are chosen (not actually my handwriting).
But, who did this to us?
Some will say, the constitution of our country has given every citizen the right of association. But, isn’t it true? It is high time certain restrictions are put in place to curb the unfolding situations….
Uduak Iniodu
I swear this is not hilarious. Eduok has opened the page of the bitter truth and we should be shedding tears. How did we get here?
Ofonime Honesty
There’s Freedom of Association!
Splinters exist because the main house stopped being a home of warmth and inclusivity. Genuine brotherhood has been in exile for donkey years. 10,000 groups are formed because reforming the main house is war.
The main house is not failing because of splinter groups; the splinter groups exist because the main house became a clique affair.
In all, there is freedom of association.
Case closed!
Obong Akpaekong
I read a piece that was said to have won a German Award for Short Stories yesterday. It was good enough for the award. Your piece is good enough for such award. You tell the truth. Thanks for the insight.
Esin Esin
Though freedom of Association is allowed, this satire is a call for self introspection within the Union and for the State Central leadership to device an approach to stem the excesses.
Such approach may include public disclaimer of such groups, suspension of such members from the State affiliation etc.
Esin Esin
Though freedom of Association is allowed, this satire is a call for self introspection within the Union and for the State Central leadership to device an approach to stem the excesses.
Such approach may include public disclaimer of such groups, suspension of such members from the State affiliation etc.
Uduak Utip Ekong
The media landscape is changing at an alarming rate
I was told (by someone I hold in very high esteem) that the media space is too large for the NUJ to control…
Look at the configuration of the groups you are talking about!
It’s a blend of journalists and others
It’s actually very interesting the way it’s going and I’m following keenly
Eduok is a staff member of AKBC
